Darling!!
My house de internet spoil le.. ):
The starhub must be on maintenance again
Lol
End up guess wat
Im writing on Microsoft words
Save it up first den post it up tml..
When the internet is back up
Or at ur house. Haha


Sinzhi..
I sometimes really wonder
At any point of time will u get mad
After reading my post last time..
I really scared cos I post wat my true feelings are
U read le den will not happen leh..
If u really dun like me talking bad about ur fren at times
Please tell me k..
If u feel like
Wa lao eh why my bf keep complaining
Why my bf keep thinking like tt..
Why cant he jus be normal
Why he keep complaining about small small stuff
And about hj..
Please do tell me..
I will try not to blog about such stuff..
Its meant to let u read and know about how I feel.
and not to let u sad or pissed or feel anything negative..
inform me if u feel so k..


Dear.
Issit really I have been thinking way too much?
I find it okok leh..
Though at time a bit more.
But still ok leh.
At least im prepared for the worst most of the times lar
I knew certain stuff will happen..
Maybe that why it didn’t affect me like how It would
Should the same thing happen to others..
I think they already flare up or something le..
i really wish there is some godly person outside
that can answer all my question sia..
all my doubt and stuff.
At least I wun have to keep thinking or guessing or deciding.. ):


This week other than Monday I nv blog sia.
Never even write on journal book..
I guess its cos I dun have much feel to write
Nothing much to write
Or im jus lazy bah
But I know Thursday was a bit zzz to me
He bought u the orangey doll!!! ):
The thingy I wanna buy so long ago but didn’t
Cos u said u going shift hostal ltr very ma fan..
Sian..
I should have jus ignored u and bought it
Now end up he buy for u le.
The feeling jus sucks big big time..
I wish time can turn back..
I knew he would get u smth but I nv expected tt..
That is like in my eyes lar..
Way too extreme le..


Dear..
Sorry to say bad stuff about him
I really though he was very good guy.
To me he really was…
Caring towards u.
Being by ur side when u are feeling down
Or need company to talk to..
He is really a very nice person.
But at times I really find him an big asshole lo..
I dunno why also.
He jus does things in a way that
He treats me to be non-exsistant..
Like u got no bf like tt..
There are things that a bf should do and a fren should do..
I feel at times he is passing the line
And my tolerance level.. *argh*


Today manage to book out early and meet dear for dinner
The feeling shoik sia.
Can meet dear for dinner..
Haha..
After that we went for a short
‘I light marina’ walk..
Hehs.
Walk a bit den we both very tired tired..
Den went home le..
Darling
Sorry if I showed attitude to u today again..
Im really really sorry..
I tried my best to act normal even though im thinking a lot inside
I know u wanna hear wat im thinking
But so far everytime I shared with u
The expected consequence tt I predict
Will occur..
I didn’t want to tell u cos I wanna prevent tt situation
But yet u wan me to tell u..
And if I dun tell u.. I will have mood change
Den like attitude and dao u
Den u angry..
I dun wan see u angry.. so I tell u..
But end uip u will sad..
AHHHHHHHH
So confusing ):


Dear..
U know today when I saw the photo on fb
I was really dam bloody pissed?
I dunno why but tt feeling jus came to me
My frens around me happen to saw the photo..
Den like comment on it
I acted normal..
Acted like I was really ok with it..
But inside..
i was feeling different
if it wasn’t for u explaining wat happen
I think I will go crazy the whole week
Sometimes..
Wat u see may not be wat is seems,..
I wonder why ur frens so zzz de sia
Maybe u also bah cos u say u will do the same also
Its like people attach le u still sort of cre8 scandal for them
U dun feel bad meh?
It like purposely trying to make the other partner angry
And make them break up lo..
Maybe ur frens dunno my exsistance bah
That why they make such stuff up
I hope so lar..
I choose to believe so..
Or maybe its jus for fun..
But this sort of fun I will nv do it bah..
Its very… I dunno how to say.. zzz-ish bah
Maybe asshole-ish? Lol.


Mei nv
I think im better at expressing myself writing than speaking lo
Somehow I write le…
I can write out all I feel…
Maybe its cos I face a computer or book bah
When I try to tell u how I feel at time
Its very hard to find the correct words and express how I feel
Cos words somehow are always very sensitive
Use one wrong word and its G_G le
Haha..


Everytime I book out
All I wan is to spend jus more time with u
Yes I do spend more time..
But most of the time for the pass few weeks
The 1st day we meet
Sure very gloomy and emos de
I wish everyday we were out will be happy..
I wun think so much
I wun compare to last time and be self- contented..
I jus wan my weekend to be with u
Happily..
At least that’s the motivation I have whenever im in camp..
Next week is going to be a long and shiong week
I hope me and darling can be back to normal before i book in
If things are bad when I book in..
I think I will really go crazy inside le..
I guess I already am mad le..
Becoming crazy is jus a step away
Hehe..
Don feel like writing anymore about why I will go mad le..
U wan den ask me on Friday/sat.. should u read this on the same day I post lo
Cos will say a lot of stuff..
And a lot of thoughs.
That are best not written down here..
Lol


Its 1.22 am.
And I still dun feel very tied..
But in order to meet u tml early.
I shal force myself to slp..
Hopefully tml can spend more time with u
Despite ur busy time to send off ur niece with hj and meet zj for dinner
Hopefully I can sent u around lar…
I see u part with them I sure feel very ZZ de
But at least get to spend more time..
That more than enuf le..
Sorry daer for letting u go thru all this pain
And strsss. And shit..
I guess im the culprit for all these on u..
Dui bu qi..
I hope I wun give u much anymore.. (:
I go orh orh le..
Nights darling
Sweet dream
Oh ya1 u nv bathe and slp arh
Hahahah
Lazy and dirty Piggy!!
Hehs
Wo ai ni
Aishiteru!